In 2018, I shared something deeply personal with you here. It was really hard to write, but I did it to hopefully encourage at least one person. 2016 was really a defining year for me. The loss I experienced shook me to my core in an unexpected way. But in that same year, I began an unexpected journey that has led to today’s post. If I shared my grief with you, it’s only right I share my immense joy with you! This, is the easiest most exciting post I have written here so far.
I GOT MARRIED!!!
On the day we met, it turns out that everybody else around us saw what we didn’t. For many years of our friendship, AB had told me stories about this cousin of hers that she admired so much. When I moved to NYC, she had tried to get us both to meet each other but that didn’t happen. And so it wasn’t until at AB’s sister’s graduation that we met for the first time. The questions that family asked that day all centered around the fact that they felt like we knew each other previously and were an item. So perhaps there were sparks at first sight? Since that day, he has felt like my family. I used to think that my mind embraced him as family just because he is AB’s cousin. I know better now.
I think I knew we were heading here even before he did and shockingly, that knowledge did not scare or deter me. This “knowing” is a question that people often ask. How do you “know” a person is your “the one”? I cannot tell you there was one single moment when I knew but I remember after one trip to visit him when he moved away and we became a long distance couple, one of my best girls asked me if I thought I was at my “final bus stop”. I didn’t flinch when I told her yes. Now, that is a scary place to be (immediately I made that declaration, I started to fear what would happen if he wasn’t at his final bus stop as well). But one thing I learnt from my 2016 loss is to not hold back my feelings for another person just because it’s too soon or the time isn’t right or it’s too uncertain. I learnt to love completely and if my love gets rejected, so be it – we move on. I will never live with the struggle of holding back love that is bursting to be shared or with the regret of not expressing how I feel fully to a person out of fear of their reaction. We take risks with money, career, business, so many things, but become so passive when it comes to love and relationships. I learnt and decided not to be that way anymore.
After our very intimate (just us 2 and the officiant) civil ceremony, we had a 30min photoshoot to commemorate the day (thanks to my angel friend, Dami. The booking was done on shoott and it was an amazing experience). I had hoped to share the pictures here with you but they refuse to be uploaded. I take that as a sign. If you follow us on IG, you must have seen them on there. If you don’t, you can find them here. A friend of mine commented recently that she is yet to see how we interact as a couple. She has seen us interact as friends but not as a couple. Looking at these pictures, I think it does a good job of showing a glimpse of us as a couple.
There is no doubt that my HUSBEAU is a gift specifically delivered to me by God and only God. In 2016, the night I got the call that my boyfriend had passed away, my roommate was far away in another state and every close person in my life was either asleep or too far away. At the exact right time, I got a message from my perfect gift asking about my boyfriend’s health. He left his evening plans when I told him what had happened and just sat there with me for hours until one of my girlfriends drove down to spend the night. I’m choking up now just thinking of how much less scary those first few hours were knowing he was there, sitting in silence, waiting to respond to whatever senseless babble I came up with periodically.
I have always been a believer in getting married not because it is time to get married but because you have found THAT person. I still believe it. With all the uncertainty in marriage and hearing/ reading all kinds of disheartening stories, there is a little fear about what lies in wait along the road. But knowing that this gift of mine came from God, I am really confident and very positive about tomorrow with my THAT person.
So here’s to us; to my George!
From a girl madly in love with a man in love with her.
Till next time, beauts